Live Blogging the Academy Awards!

8:30 – The Academy Awards are starting! Here comes Hugh Jackman!!

8:32 – Jackman on the Academy cutting back this year because of the recession: “Next year I will starring in a film called New Zealand.” Fred, who studied abroad in New Zealand last semester, flipped out at this.

8:33 – Shocker. He is going to sing and dance.

8:38 – OMG! HUGH JACKMAN is fantastic. Can he do this every year?

8:40 – “I’m just contractually obligated to mention them 5 times”. Jackman on Brangelina.

8:42 – The montage of Best Supporting Actresses is going on too long. OH! There’s a reason! Eva Marie Saint, Whoopi Goldberg, Goldie Hawn, Tilda Swinton, and Angelica Huston are all presenting! Are they allowed to move from that awkward half circle?

8:45 – I love Whoopi Goldberg. “It isn’t easy being a nun.”

8:46 – Since they are clearly going to do this for every category (acting category at least), do we like it? It’s more personal than a video tribute. I like that.

8:47 – Penelope Cruz wins! “It’s not going to be 45 seconds, I can say that right now. Has anybody ever fainted here? Because I might be the first one.” She thanks Woody Allen and Pedro Almodovar for creating great female characers. So true. “Art is our universal language”. That was an AMAZING speach.

8:52 – And we’re back. I really am enjoying this intimate feeling of the Academy Awards.

8:53 – Steve Martin and Tina Fey are presenting Best Original Screenplay and Best Adapted Screenplay. So hilarious. Tina Fey: “Steve, no one wants to hear about our religion.”

8:56 – Dustin Lance Black wins for Milk! An amazing speech and tribute to Harvey Milk.

8:59 – More Tina Fey and Steve Martin: “Don’t fall in love with me.” I love a good 30 Rock reference.

9:01 – Best Adapted Screenplay – Simon Beaufoy. It was only a matter of time that Slumdog Millionaire won an award.

9:03 – Jennifer Aniston and Jack Black presenting Best Animated.

(Please don’t pan to Brangelina. Please don’t pan to Brangelina. Please don’t pan to Brangelina. Please don’t pan to Brangelina.)

9:04 – This is how Jack Black makes movies “Every year I make a Dreamworks film and then I take the money and bet it on Pixar”.

9:06 – The video of this year’s animated pictures is where all the show’s money went.

9:07 – Wall-E wins! Andrew Stanton thanked his high school drama teacher for casting in him Hello Dolly.

9:08 – Best Animated Short – “The shorter your movie is, the shorter amount of time your Panda has to win the nation’s heart.” And a pan to Brangelina. She was in Kung Fu Panda so I guess that’s okay. I don’t have a clue what he said except for the last part.

9:14 – Erica has arrived to the viewing session. “Did I miss Robert Pattinson?” Someone has her priorities straight.

9:15 – More Hugh Jackman. I missed him.

9:16 – Horse Face and James Bond are presenting Best Art Direction. Benjamin Button wins. Which is good. I was really worried that it would go 0 for 13 and that would be embarassing.

9:19 – I am not liking this constant jazz music in the background. Quite annoying.

9:20 – Best Costume Design – The Duchess. Duh. When don’t period pieces like The Duchess win? “Keira Knightley. You are one classy lady.”

9:23 – Horse Face and James Bond still presenting – this time for Make-Up. Make-up doesn’t help your horse face, SJP. The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. 2 for 13.

9:25 – Amanda Seyfried and R Pattz, who clearly thinks he is still playing a vampire. They are introducing a MONTAGE!

9:26 – I love montages. Romance! Set to Coldplay!

9:29 – “Don’t be mean to Robert. He got all his lines right and he combed his hair.” – Oh, Erica.

9:31 – Ben Stiller and Natalie Portman are presenting Best Cinematography. Or is that Joaquin Phoenix. “I just want to retire from being a funny guy.” And then Stiller wanders the stage while Portman is announcing the nominees. Amazing.

9:35Slumdog Millionaire wins Best Cinematography. 2 for 2.

9:36 – I could watch Ben Stiller as Joaquin Phoenix all day.

9:38 – Jessica Biel, talking about the Scientific and Technical Awards. What was that? You made me listen to Jessica Biel with no Hugh Jackman? Blasphemy!

9:42 – MONTAGE! Starring James Franco and Seth Rogan and Janusz Kamiński. “They made me do it Spielberg!”

9:46 – The three are presenting Best Live Action Short. Kaminski is the first DP to present an award and I love him for this: – “Suck on that, Mantle.” Haha. Spielzugland (Toyland) wins.

9:52 – “The musical is back ladies and gentleman.” Now Hugh Jackman is singing and dancing. And enter Beyonce. Way to ruin something good Beyonce. Seriously? What is the purpose of this? AND why must Beyonce sing “At Last” everywhere she goes? Why am I being subjected to Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgeons? AND WHY IS THERE A DRUMLINE? This is like musicals on steroids. Way to ruin West Side Story.

9:53 – Baz Luhrmann is responsible for this disaster. That explains so much. And congratulations, the musical was back and you just killed it again.

10:01 – Finally! Time for Best Supporting Actor. Christopher Walker, Kevin Kline, Cuba Gooding Jr., Alan Arkin and Joel Grey are presenting. Where’s Javier Bardem? I guess he’s busy… busy being sexy.

10:06 – “Seymour Philip Hoffman”? Nice once, Alan Arkin. Cuba Gooding Jr. ragging on Robert Downey Jr. That’s a good light-hearted moment before this part of the show becomes very sentimental.

10:07 – The award for Best Supporting Actor goes to Heath Ledger. A very touching speech.

10:11 – Now for a montage of Documentaries in 2008. It’s a good transition to Bill Maher presenting Best Documentary.

10:15 – Man on Wire wins!!!! I love Philippe Petit! “I’d like to thank the Academy for believing in magic.” And then he balanced the statuette on his chin! I love him.

10:17 – Best Short documentary goes to “Smile Pinkey”.

10:22 – Okay. I love montage. But there are seriously too many for my liking right now.

10:26 – Will Smith presenting for Outstanding Visual Effects: “Action movies have fans.” Word. The Curious Case of Benjamin Button wins again. 3 for 13. I knew they would all the technical stuff.

10:28 – Best Sound Editing: The Dark Knight.

10:31Slumdog Millionaire wins for Best Sound Mixing. Resul Pookutty is so cute.

10:33 – Will Smith: “Yes, they still have me here. I believe Hugh is napping.”

10:34 – Best Film Editing – Chris Dickens wins for Slumdog Millionaire.

10:40 – Fred: Maybe I’ll go make some popcorn during the next break.”

Me: “You’re not allowed to eat that in here.”

Fred: It’s my room.

Me: “So? It’s my Oscars.”

Clearly, we have lived together for too long.

10:41 – Hey, Eddie Murphy. I thought he was going to make some crack about not winning for Dreamgirls in ’06. But no, he’s presenting the Jean Hersholt award to Jerry Lewis.

10:44 – Um, more Coldplay. Really? That is too much sound for the first clips of Jerry Lewis. Nice speech Jerry Lewis. Short, sweet and to the point.

10:45 – And hour to go people. Will the show end before 11:45?

10:50 – Time for Best Score nominees.

10:54 – Alicia Keys and ZAC EFRON (No! No! No!) are presenting! Thank god he said practicaly nothing A.R. Rahman wins! Another award for Slumdog Millionaire!

10:55 – Here we go. BOLLYWOOD!

10:57 – And now the Bollywood dancers are performing with John Legend who is singing the song from Wall-E? Now I know why Peter Gabriel pulled out.

11:01 – Oh man. They are butchering this. So bad.

11:02 – “Jai Ho” wins!

11:05 – Best Foreign Language Film: Departures from Japan. WOAH! Everyone I’m watching this with is shocked by this.

11:11 – Queen Latifah is introducing the “In Memorium” segment. Hey. She’s singing! Okay I don’t care that Queen Latifah is singing! I want to see the video tribute! It’s making me dizzy.

11:15 – That was so irritating. You couldn’t read any of the names or what they did. And it made me dizzy.

11:18 – Jackman’s back. He should start wearing less clothes to liven up this telecast. Sid Ganis isn’t making a speech! Yes!

11:20 – Reese Witherspoon is presenting Best Director to… DANNY BOYLE! A lovely acceptance speech.

11:25 – Best Actress time. Sophia Loren, Shirley MacLaine, Halle Berry, Nicole Kidman and Marion Cotillard. This is one big cry fest. And Sophia Loren, I love you but you are one hot mess. A HOT mess.

11:31 – The Academy Award goes to (Oscar Gods please let it be Winslet)… Kate Winslet. It’s about damn time and she is going to freak out. I would freak out too if I got to hug

11:33 THE SOUND ON THE TV JUST CUT OUT DURING WINSLET’S SPEECH!

11:35 – Best speech of the night! I loved her dad whisteling to her. “I’m sorry Meryl Streep but you’re just going to have to suck it up.”

11:37 It’s Best Actor time – Robert DeNiro, Ben Kingsley, Anthony Hopkins, Adrien Brody (who has jumped on the Joaquin Phoenix train) and Michael Douglas are presenting. DeNiro: “How for so many years did Sean Penn get all those parts playing straight men?”

11:39 – Ellen on DeNiro and Penn: “I wonder if they are friends on facebook?”

11:42 – During Mickey Rourke’s introduction, Erica spots Robert Pattinson: “Robert! I love you. And Tina Fey!”

11:43 – Sean Penn wins. “I do know how I often I make it to appreciate me.” Well I’m glad because I didn’t want you to win this at all.

11:46 – But I guess if he’s going to talk about equal rights for everyone, I can’t hate him too much. And because he said this: “Mickey Rourke rises again and he is my brother.”

11:47 – Best Picture presented by Steven Spielberg. I do not agree with this interspersing of past Best Picture nominees during the Best Picture montage. There isn’t any point to it.

11:52 – Award goes to SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE. Those little kids are so cute.

11:55 – And it’s over! My only suggestion for next year is more shirtless Hugh Jackman. Good night!

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Live Blogging the Oscars Red Carpet!

6:26 PM – Hello! Cinefille here and it is time to start my live-blog of the 81st Annual Academy Awards.

I’m am, sadly, not watching the Red Carpet on the Big Vowel with Ryan Seacrest right now. But maybe that is a good thing. According to the text message my ex-roommate Freddie just sent me High School Musical has invaded the red carpet. I guess they are trying to bring in the tween crowd this year.
I am also waiting for Freddie to come to Blanchard so we can eat and I can actually start watching the awards. I frankly do not like receiving text messages about Miley Cyrus ruining the Oscars. I prefer to watch trainwrecks in person.

6:33 – Remember last year when Gary Busee mauled Jennifer Garner? That was a great red carpet moment. In fact. You can watch it now.

6:50 – Still not watching, Freddie just told me that Hugh Jackman is performing with Efron and Hudgeons. I think I just had a hernia.

7:09 – I have finally turned on the Big Vowel. I barely caught an interview with Michael Sheen, who plays David Frost in Frost/Nixon. Sheen on Frost: “I can’t get rid of him now.”

7:10 – Interview with Richard Jenkins. This is what happens when Seacrest meets talent. Jenkins could care less about Seacrest and his crappy interviewing skills.

7:12 – SJP is wearing a titanium plate on her chest. I think. Sidebar: Why is SJP even at the Oscars?

7:15 – R PATTZ! I hate Twilight with a passion but I think Robert Pattinson is dreamy.

7:18 – SJP and Broderick. The titanium plate up close. SJP talked about Sex and the City. She claims not to know anything. Lies SJP, lies. Poor Broderick, he’s just an accessory at these things.

7:20 Since we don’t why anyone is actually at the awards unless they are nominated of course, someone like Natalie Portman is listed on an “attendee.” This is fine by me. As long as she’s not singing too.

7:21 – Giuliana Rancic: “I think we have to take a break because I just caught a glimpse of Natalie Portman. I need to reevaluate my life”. Well, Giuliana maybe if you laid off the tanner and worked not being a shitty journalist, you wouldn’t have to do reevaluate your existence.

7:26 – Marisa Tomei! Seacrest to Tomei – “The role you played was a very determined mother.” That’s one way of describing her role as a stripper who is naked for most of the movie.

7:27 – Seacrest is trying to describe what Mickey Rourke is wearing. Based on Ryan’s description, “He is wearing an off-white suit,” he just might not actually be gay.

7:29 – Mickey Rourke is always an interesting interview. Every time he talks about his dogs, I get a little weepy.

7:35 Peter Gabriel just announced that Best Song nominees are going to be performed in medley and that is why he isn’t performing tonight. He felt that wouldn’t do the song justice. I actually respect that because he is the artist afterall, and by asking him to perform a medley with two Bollywood-esque songs is asking him to compromise a lot.

7:38 – I was attempting to do my homework for my film class, when I heard Giuliana Rancic scream. Had Busey attacked Seacrest attacked? No. Brangelina has arrived. AND Angelina is wearing a form-fitting dress. It is still black, but progress is still progress.

7:42 – Ryan Seacrest is interviewing Penelope Cruz. He just said Vicky Cristina Barcelona in a horrible Spanish accent. Cruz’s face is priceless during this exchange.

7:51 – Why I love E! There is always the possibilty of a “Keeping Up With the Kardashians” commercial. Now while Kate Winslet is being interviewed, I am pondering the size of Kim Kardashians ass and whether or not it is shrinking.

7:58 – Brad Pitt is too important to stop and talk to Seacrest.

8:00 – Switching over to ABC Red Carpet… with TIM GUNN!! This is clearly the serious portion of the Red Carpet.

8:03 – Tim Gunn to Amy Adams (I’m paraphrasing here): “You are shrouded completely in black in Doubt and you are competing against

8:03 – Room reaction to SJP – “EW! It’s HORSE FACE!”

8:05 – I love Frank Langella. He is orgasmic. Ellen to me: “How awesome would it be if Javier Bardem presented the award to Frank Langella? What if they got into a mud wrestling fight on stage?” It’s not nice to tease me like that.

8:06 – Tim Gunn meets Brangelina for a… two-second interivew. AND WHAT IS MILEY CYRUS WEARING!!!!!!!!!! She looks like she’s going to a quincieria in fairy land.

8:09 – Tim Gunn and Valentino. Epic. I just learned something about fashion that Jay Manuel could never teach me.

8:10 – Cast of Slumdog Millionaire! Cute little kids from the cast!

8:12 – Something you will only hear at a women’s college Oscar party: “Zac Efron looks like a butch lesbian.” Thank you, Saskia.

8:23 – Sorry. Got sidetracked. Was talking about Skins with Saskia.

8:24 – Some dude is interviewing Jack Black, Jonah Hill and Judd Apatow at the bar. I guess they’re not important enough to be interviewed on the

8:27 – The musical director is talking about the music that will be used tonight. Benny Goodman. Lawrence of Arabia theme. Are they trying to make me orgasm? After I typed this, Fred leans over my shoulder and whispers, “And then Zac Efron will perform.” Way kill the moment Fred.

8:28 – TWO MINUTES!!!!!!!!

Live-Blogging the SAG Awards

7:32 PM – Hello party people! Cinefille here and I’m getting ready to live blog the SAG Awards. I’m currently stationed in my friend Aria’s room, who is taking an LSAT prep test. Doesn’t she know that that prevents me from enjoying the wonder that is Ryan Seacrest and the Big Vowel.

She just better leave soon or else I will have to injure her. No one comes in between Cinefille and an award show!

7:37 – Aria is still taking her LSAT test. Tick, tock, tick, tock.

7:40 – Aria is STILL taking the LSAT. You know, Aria doesn’t even want to be a lawyer. I think she is doing this just to spite me.

7:42 – FINALLY. Aria is gone. Time to turn on the Big Vowel. And oh my, what the hell is Nicolette Sheridan wearing?

7:50 – Debbie with the Greek last name that I can’t spell always comes across as drunk whenever she interviews someone. No wonder she got canned from The View.

7:55 – So it is a good thing I turned on the Big Vowel so late. Without Seacrest, this pre-show is a downer.

8:00 – Time for the SAGs!! There was just a shot of William Shatner popping a giant champagne bottle with a couple of models. Only you Shatner, only you.

8:01 – Time for the “I’m an Actor”, when actor’s tell funny (not usually) anecdotes about when they knew they were going to be an actor. This year the stories come from Eva Longoria Parker, Victor Garber, Phylicia Rashad, Anil Kapoor (I think, correct me if I’m wrong about that),Tom Cavanaugh, Jenna Fisher, Will Arnett, and Steve Carell.

Steve Carell had the best line: “On January 15 a pilot named Chelsey Sullenberger landed a place in the icy waters of the Hudson River. It’s a good thing I was not behind the wheel of that plane, because I’m Steve Carell and I’m an actor.”

8:05 – First award – Best Award in a Comedy Series – to Tina Fey. Shocker. Funny speech, it’s a cute tribute to her daughter

8:09 – Apparently Dev Patel can’t read from a teleprompter. He wrote the introduction to Slumdog Millionaire.

8:10 – Actor in a Comedy Series – Thank you Jon Hamm for that AMAZING joke about Chinese Olympic Team. Alec Baldwin wins, who somehow never fails to come across as a jerk.

8:19 – Evan Rachel Wood introduces a montage about aptly titled “Trailblazers”. She introduced it with such a monotone I thought we were a the “In Memoriam” portion the evening. Does the SAG suddenly think it is the AMPAS all of the sudden? Only the Academy Awards can do pointless montages and do them much better. That was a crappy montage.

8:22 – Why is Claire Danes here?

8:23 – The award for Best Comedy Series ensemble goes to… the cast of 30 Rock. Yet another shocker. Jane Krakowski accepts the award. I was hoping Tracey Morgan would accept the award. And that was a nice diss of the cast of Ally McBeal, Jane Krakowski. “The cast of 30 Rock is defintely a much heavier cast.” Tina Fey loved it but it took a second for everyone to get the punchline.

8:27 – Frank Langella and Michael Sheen. FRANK LANGELLA! And Michael Sheen. Just kidding. I like Michael Sheen too.

8:29 – Greg Kinnear announces the first film category – Supporting Actress in a Motion Picture. Fingers crossed for Penelope Cruz or Viola Davis or Amy Adams or Taraji P. Henson or Kate Winslet. I can’t really decided on a favorite in case you couldn’t tell.

Kate Winslet wins! Does this mean that Winslet will finally win an Oscar? Remember, she nominated for The Reader in the Best Actress category, not for Best Supporting Actress.

8:38 – Best Performance by an Actor in a Drama Series. Sidebar: I just noticed that the SAG is politically correct these days. No more actresses here!

Hugh Laurie wins. Will Jon Hamm ever win for Mad Men? I know he’s won a Golden Globe, but will Jon Hamm

8:42 – John Krasinski and Amy Poehler presenting an award for Best Actress – ahem Female Actor – in a Drama series. Finally interesting presenters. Can Amy Poehler and Tina Fey just host an award show already?

Sally Field wins! I personally wanted Peggy Olson, I mean, Elisabeth Moss to win. At least Sally Field always makes a lovely acceptance speech.

8:47 – Emile Hirsch, Josh Brolin, and James Franco introduce a clip Milk. I hope Milk wins.

8:49 – Time for a Drama Series Ensemble to be presented. I love that Eric McCormack poked fun at the Denny as a ghost story line from Grey’s Anatomy. Oh the jokes you can tell when certain people aren’t present!

8:51Mad Men wins! It is by far the best drama on television right now, so the best cast definitely won.

8:57 – I really have to pee. But Aria told me that I’m not allowed to leave her room since she’s still taking the LSAT. Did I mention that she doesn’t even want to be a lawyer? Sometimes I just don’t get Aria. I know this has nothing to with the SAG Awards but I really have to pee. But I can’t because Aria has trapped me in her room. So I’m bitter and venting on the internet.

9:00 – The director of the SAG is talking and since I’m not an actor, I really don’t care about what he has to say.

9:01 – Forest Whitaker is presenting the Lifetime Achievement Award to James Earl Jones. I hope he finishes talking soon and that the video tribute isn’t too long so I can listen to Jones to give a speech.

9:06 – It’s ironic that James Earl Jones has one of the most iconic voices in entertainment history and someone else is narrating his life story.

9:08 – This is taking a little bit too long for my liking (mostly because I still have to pee). I just updated The Doozy Marooney in order to distract myself.

9:13 – James Earl Jones made a short but sweet speech. After referencing Genesis and comparing the actor to God (because an actor has a similar responsibility to give life and meaning to a character) he said this: “Paul Newman, someone down here likes you.”

9:19 – Outstanding Performance by an Actress – Female Actor – in a Television Movie or Mini-Series goes to Laura Linney. It was presented by Ernest Borgenine. Hehe, he’s so cute.

9:23 – Amy Adams and Viola Davis introduce a clip from Doubt.

9:24 – Male Actor in a Television Movie or Mini-Series goes to… Paul Giamatti.

9:26 – Susan Sarandon introduces the “In Memoriam” segment.

9:31 – Aria’s back. I CAN PEE!

9:33 – Aahh, relief.

9:36 – Male Actor in a Supporting Role – goes to Heath Ledger. Gary Oldman accepts the award on his behalf.

9:39 – Taraji P. Henson and Brad Pitt introduce a clip from Benjamin Button. They also cannot read teleprompters.

9:42 – I really enjoy watching award shows with Aria. In the ten minutes since she’s been in the room she has already said this: “I’d be on board with him (Heath Ledger) not winning” and “Brad Pitt is hot but he can’t read for shit” and “Oh you want me to win? Thank you!”.

9:48 – Ralph Fiennes presents the award for Best Actress – I mean Female Actress. I’ll never get used to that. Aria upon seeing Ralph Fiennes: “Oh! Voldemort!

MERYL STREEP WINS! Standing ovation!! “Even though awards mean nothing to me anymore, I’m very happy.”Haha! Best. Speech. Ever!

9:54 – Male Actor in a Leading Role – goes to Sean Penn. Surprisingly, it is his first SAG win. I did not know that.

9:59 – Anthony Hopkins (or Mr CIA man as Aria called him) Best Ensemble – Slumdog Millionaire.

10:03 – The SAG Awards are over. It is pretty safe to say that Slumdog Millionaire isn’t going to win many awards.

Just kidding. Slumdog Millionaire is going to clean up at the Oscars. But as for the acting categories… they have been thrown a huge curveball. Sean Penn instead of Mickey Rourke; Meryl Streep instead of Kate Winslet; and Kate Winslet winning in the supporting category for The Reader when she is only nominated for Best Actress.

I really have no clue who is going to the Oscar now.

And Aria just told me she isn’t listening to me as I ramble on about the Oscars. I think that means it is time for me to leave her room.

Cinefille out.

Live Blogging the 2009 Golden Globes

Hola!

Cinefille here. As usual, I’m live-blogging the Golden Globes, which (in case you haven’t heard) are BACK this year after last year’s absence. Let’s not remember that day when I lost my mind and we all had to suffer through the worst press conference ever.

Right now, it is 7 PM. I finally have turned on E! and am watching my favorite red carpet pre-show ever. Seacrest and co. never fail to excite and drive me absolutely crazy. So let’s get to the (pre) show!

7:06 – Seacrest just referred to E! as “The Big Vowel”. That is oddly sexual.

7:07 Giuliana-skinny-as-a-twig-Rancic just interviewed Stephen Moyer, from one of my guilty pleasure’s True Blood. They talked about nudity and such: “You can’t see certain bits of the lady, so you end up with the director coming up to you saying, ‘Dude … so, can we have your little buttocks going up and down?’”

And Seacrest just chatted up Anna Paquin; they talked about how vampires were everywhere last year. Groundbreaking interview, Seacrest, groundbreaking.

7:16 Seacrest is talking to Maggie Gyllenhaal about Heath Ledger. She said some lovely things about Heath and his career: “I hope he wins.”

7:19 Drew Barrymore looks like she stuck her hand in an electrical socket.

7:20 Oh good lord. The Jonas Brothers are here. Quick! Which one do you think is gay? My money’s on Joe. Any one who breaks little Taylor Swift’s heart is a flamer.

OH! Miley Cyrus and Nick Jonas almost crossed paths! There might be some drama in the Mickey Mouse Clubhouse.

7:23 AND here’s Miley. 1) She’s feeling herself up whenever she tells Seacrest who designed her dress. 2) She’s talking about her hand me down porsche. Whatever Miley Cyrus. I’ll have you’re hand me down porsche since you are clearly don’t appreciate it.

7:32 It’s deja vu. Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet are together. DiCaprio about Winslet: “She’s my homie.”

7:35 There was just a shot of Miley Cyrus on the red carpet and her creeper dad was right behind her. I know people thought that the Vanity Fair cover was bad, but her relationship with her creeper dad is was worse.

7:41 Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are ignoring Seacrest. Seriously. He is awkwardly standing off to the side while they pose. That is AMAZING. Even Seacrest can’t get near them. When the king of red carpets can’t come near you, you must be pretty close to God.

7:52 Megan Fox just had the strangest interview with Giuliana the twig. She compared herself to Alan Alda, said something about being transgendered, David Silver and a 20 inch waist. I just don’t know. Remind me to find clip of that later.

7:58 I’m over “The Big Vowel”. I’ve switched over to NBC. Hey! It’s Tiki Barber; way to remind me about the Giants losing to the Eagles today. Thanks, NBC.

8:00
I’m not gonna lie. One of my favorite parts of the Golden Globes (other than who will get drunk first) is the opening to a random song. This time it’s the Pussycat Dolls.

8:01 First award! Best Supporting Actress in a Motion Picture – and the Golden Globe goes to –

Kate Winslet!

I’m surprised that she won. Then again, everyone does love Kate Winslet so it is about time she won something. Anything. Lovely tribute to Anthony Minghella and Sydney Pollack as well.

8:05 Look at Sting! What an interesting look. He’s presenting Best Original Song. It’s always smart to get the categories that most people don’t care about out of the way first. God I hope Miley Cyrus doesn’t win. Seriously if she beats Bruce Springsteen, I’ll flip out.

Bruce won! “This is the only time I’m going to be in competition with Clint Eastwood.” His acceptance speech is great; any chance to listen to Bruce talk about music is such a treat.

8:15 Fingers crossed for Neil Patrick Harris in the Supporting Actor category.

Nope. Tom Wilkinson won for John Adams. He just gave the cutest, most befuddled speech ever.

8:18 The award for Best Supporting Actress in a television series, miniseries etc. goes to Laura Dern for Recount.

8:25 – Woah. Look at Don Cheadle’s shiny head. His introduction to Burn After Reading is funny; way to diss Brad Pitt. Good luck getting cast in a Cohen Brothers movie my friend.

8:27 Watching Eva Mendes introduce the president of the HFPA is a reminder of why she is not a stage actress.

I love the fact that the president of HFPA’s welcome speech was short and sweet. Best decision of the night; Sid Ganis take note.

8:28 Hayden-I-love-the-dolphins-way-more-than-I-love-award-shows-Panitierre and Zac Efron are presenting the award for Best Actor in a TV Drama. This is some funny stuff they are saying. Just watch dolphin girl roll her eyes.

The Golden Globe goes to Gabriel Byrne. He wasn’t there and watching the two them accept the award on his behalf was SUPER awkward.

8:30 The two dudes from the Star Trek movie are presenting the award for Best Actress in a TV Drama. They should have presented in klingon; that would have been way more interesting.

The Golden Globe goes to Anna Paquin and not January Jones. I’m kind of upset that Mad Men was shut out in the acting categories.

8:36
Finally Ricky Gervais is here to liven things up. He’s a little bitter that he wasn’t nominated. “That is the last time I have sex with 200 middle aged journalists.” Oh Ricky Gervais, you are the only person brave enough to make Holocaust jokes.

8:39 The Jonas Brothers are presenting… this is embarassing to watch.

Yay! Wall-E won!

8:42 Johnny Depp is presenting Best Actress in a Musical or Comedy. Is he wearing a suit that is too big for him?

Sally Hawkins wins! Good for her; Happy-Go-Lucky is so enjoyable because of her. Her speech is definitely the sweetest and the best so far.

8:48 I love how tonight’s winners are generally moved and speechless. Granted it means that there speeches go on for a bit too long, but it is refreshing to see people who are generally surprised and awed by the fact that they won a Golden Globe.

8:52 Jake Gyllenhaal introducing The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. I certainly hope this movie wins; it is by far my favorite movie of the year.

8:54 Drew Barrymore with her socket hair is presenting the award for Best Miniseries… Since I am from Cranford, NJ it would be entertaining if Cranford won.

But the Golden Globe goes to John Adams. Was that even a contest?

8:57 Demi Moore just told her daughter not to hunch. Priceless. She should have told dolphin girl not to be a snobby grump.

8:58 The Golden Globe for Best Supporting Actor goes to Heath Ledger. Chris Nolan paid Lovely tribute to him.

9:03 So I’m sitting in the TV room in my dorm, which I reserved to watch the Golden Globes. And this girl walked in and asked me if I’m watching anyhting important. When I responded “Yes, the Golden Globes,” she rolled her eyes, stormed away and left the door wide open. I guess someone really loves Desperate Housewives.

9:05 Tom Brokaw is introducing Frost/Nixon. How appropriate.

9:07 Colin Farrell presenting an award for the Foreign Film. Nice reference to his drug addictions. The award goes to Waltz of Bashir.

9:09 Great shot of Robert Downey Jr. and his purple shades.

9:10 The award for Lead Actress in a Miniseries goes to Laura Linney in John Adams. She is incredible as Abigail Adams and she gave a great acceptance speech; short and sweet.

9:17 Everyone is shushing the audience after the commercial break. It’s kind of turning into a running joke.

Gerard Butler introduced a clip of In Bruges. That’s a comedy?

9:19 So Seth Rogan’s cocaine joke bombed. At least Simon Beaufoy won for Best Screenplay for Slumdog Millionaire. On director Danny Boyle: “He made it fly.”

9:21 Amy Poehler and Patrick Dempsey presenting for Best Actor in a Comedy Series. The Golden Globe goes to Alec Baldwin. “Thank you, Tina. Thank you, Tina. Thank you, Tina.”

9:28 Wow, Renee Zellweger, what a dress.

Well. That was an interesting clip. From The Reader.

9:30 Terrance Howard and the always engrossing Megan Good are presenting the award for Best Actor in a TV miniseries. Paul Giamatti won for John Adams. “Wilkinson got me smoking again.” Haha!

9:33 Laurence Fishburne and Glenn Close presenting the Globe for Best Comedy Series. Is it just me or do the awards feel like they are being presented in any random old way?

And the Golden Globe goes to… 30 Rock! (Just between you and me, I wrote that before Glenn Close announced it.)

OMG! Tracy Morgan accepting the award because Barack Obama won – welcome to post-racial America everyone! Funniest and most unexpected speech of the night.

9:42 Pierce Brosnan just introduced Mamma Mia!. I’ve just remembered the image of him singing “S.O.S.”. Thanks HFPA.

9:44 P. Diddy (Is that the name he goes by now?) is making a great case for why he is the next great American actor.

Slumdog Millionaire wins another award! This time for Best Score. A.R. Rahman just thanked the billion people of India. How cute!

9:48 – Tina Fey wins for 30 Rock! Woohoo! I lvoe that she just told some people to suck it. Yet another amazing Tina Fey acceptance speech.

9:54 Martin Scorsese to present the Cecille B. Demille Award to Steven Spielberg.

“Steven Spielberg and the art of cinema. One is unthinkable without the other.”

I think everyone in the audience has worked with Spielberg. I love that he called Scorsese his inspiration. Such a great acceptance speech.

10:13 Emma Thompson and Dustin Hoffman presenting together! AMAZING.

Best Director goes to…Danny Boyle, Slumdog Millionaire.

So remember how I said Benjamin Button would win Best Picture, I have feeling that isn’t going to happen.

10:16 Sigourney Weaver introducing a clip of Revolutionary Road. That movie looks so depressing but I cannot wait to see it.

10:19 Sandra Bullock, as charming as ever, presenting for Best Actor in a Comedy Series. Nice Spanish accent Sandra. Been spending too some time at Hebrew school?

And Colin Farrell wins? I was not expecting that, but his speech was lovely. It’s so surreal seeing him get emotional.

I really do love how acceptance speeches are not cut off during the Golden Globes telecast. You actually get to see people happy to win an award.

10:28 Sacha Baron Cohen presenting. Awesome diss to Madonna btw.

Vicky Cristina Barcelona wins! Nice honorable mention to Woody Allen at the end.

10:35 Shahrukh Khan!!! And even more love for Slumdog Millionaire.

10:38 The Golden Globe for Best Actress in a Drama goes to…Kate Winslet! EEk!

10:44 Rainn Wilson and Blake Lively presenting – kind of awkward but it works.

MAD MEN wins!! It’s by far my favorite show on television right now so I’m super excited that it won AND that Matthew Weiner got to accept the award in person this year.

10:50 Susan Sarandon presenting Best Actor in a Drama.

Mickey Rourke wins for The Wrestler. Coarcest speech of the night… and the first speech to get played off. You let Kate Winslet talk for five minutes each time she won, but you can’t let Mickey Rourke talk for just a little longer? I mean, he paid tribute to his dogs for keeping him together when he was down and almost out of the business. So what if he said balls a lot. Okay, end rant.

10:58 Tom Cruise presenting Best Motion Picture Drama.

The Golden Globe goes to Slumdog Millionaire.

And good night everybody! That’s what I love about the Golden Globes. It just ends.

Emmy 2008: The Live Blog

10:58 – AND we’re done. And I’m going to bed. GOOD NIGHT!

10:55 – Best Drama series goes to… MAD MEN!

10:54 30 Rock Wins! Woohoo!

10:52 – Mary Tyler Moore, I love you but something off wrong with your appearance. Betty White, I love you and nothing is ever wrong with you.

10:51 – Jeff Probst wins. How anticlimatic. Well, afterall he was the first.

10:45 – The Reality Show Competition host bit was probably the best planned bit of the night.

10:42 – Tina Fey wins for 30 Rock and as expected, she delivers an amazing, amazing space.

10:41 – Brooke Shields:”Is that your hand on my ass?” “Yes, and it’s respecting you.” I love Craig Ferguson.

10:40 – Man they are really rushing this thing.

10:39 – Bryan Cranston wins for Breaking Bad!

10:38 – Why hello Kiefer.

10:28 – Glenn Close wins for Damages. If it had to be any of them (i.e. not Sally Field) I guess I’ll settle for Glenn Close.

10:27 – Whoops. Technical difficulties.

10:26 – ALEC BALDWIN WINS! Well-deserved, my friend, well-deserved.

10:25 – Okay. It’s time for Best Actor in a Comedy Series. Not Charlie Sheen. Not Charlie Sheen. Not Charlie Sheen. Not Charlie Sheen. Not Charlie Sheen. Not Charlie Sheen. Not Charlie Sheen. Not Charlie Sheen. Not Charlie Sheen. Not Charlie Sheen. Not Charlie Sheen. Not Charlie Sheen. Not Charlie Sheen. Not Charlie Sheen.

10:23 – Paul Giamatti wins the Emmy for John Adams, “I am living proof that anybody can play the president. Anybody.”

10:16 Mad Men wins for Best Writing! I love this show.

10:12 – Is Kate Walsh wearing a present?

10:09 – Don Rickles win an Emmy for Mr. Warmth. God I love him.

10:05 – And now we’re watching Entourage during the commercials.

10:03 John Adams wins. Is it coincidental that this miniseries is winning so many awards during a time when the presidential election has made for some of the best television this year?

9:59 – The world without Rickles would be like the world without cannolis. I would have let him accept my Emmy for me.

9:57 – Kathy Griffin and DON RICKLES.

9:46 – The poor guy from John Adams got cut off.

9:44 – Colbert and Stewart, together again. “What America needs is a prune.” Brilliant.

9:42 – Probst should stick Survivor.

9:36 – Snaps for Christina Applegate. And a nice round of applause to Sydney Pollack.

9:33 – You know, Martin Sheen really is the President of Hollywood.

9:24 – TINA FEY WINS.

9:19 – Lauren Conrad! GO AWAY! She looks so out of place. And that dress she designed is kind of, what’s the word, ugly.

9:18 – The Daily Show wins. “I’m looking forward to the next administration. Whoever it is.”

9:14 – The cast of Laugh-in presenting Best Variety Show. Genius.

9:10 – Me: “Why isn’t The Hills nominated for Best Reality Show Non Competition?” Liz: “Because it would be nominated for Best Drama. Duh.”

9:07 – Laura Linney wins for John Adams. “I’m thankful for the community organizers who formed our country.”

9:06 – Well that was pretty impressive. I think. I’m too tired to know what’s what anymore.

9:01 – Josh Groban. I have been waiting for this moment. I can’t decide if I’m supposed to like this or if I’m high.

8:56 – “Truth is what you get other people to believe” – Tommy Smothers. Think about it.

8:50 – Steve Martin introducing a tribute to Tommy Smothers. I’d rather have him host than any of the three buffoons and the one prop hosting this thing tonight (Bergeron is not included because I love Dancing with the Stars too much to knock him).

8:49 – Maybe the show is running late because Howie Mandel and Jeff Probst are talking too much. Seriously. It’s like The Odd Couple on drugs.

8:47 The Colbert Report wins! Finally!

8:43 – My favorite part of the Emmys is and always will be my favorite part.

8:41 – Diane Wiest wins for In Treatment. She couldn’t be there because she’s trapped with the scientologists.

8:37 – I am not looking forward to Josh Groban’s performance. Despite what the previews keep telling me.

8:30 – Ricky Gervais. Getting back his Emmy. A kind of stealing the show right from under our five lovely hosts.

8:29 – The guy with the complicated name from Damages wins. Methinks it’s an upset. Personally wanted John Slattery from Mad Men to win.

8:26 – Heidi Klum = prop. I guess that’s the true definition of supermodel.

8:19 – Jean Smart wins for Samantha Who? Unexpected (I thought Vanessa Williams would win) but not unworthy.

8:12 – Third consecutive Emmy for Jeremy Piven. And he disses the shitty opening. Amazing. But it’s time to get someone else to win. There’s no reason why Rainn Wilson, Neil Patrick Harris and Kevin Dillon shouldn’t have an Emmy too.

8:09 – Tina Fey and Amy Poehler presenting.

8:08 – And Heidi strips. Is anyone else disturbed that Tom Bergeron and William Shatner basically stripped her?

8:06 – Heidi is just standing there. Strange.

8:05 – All five hosts, all together.

8:01 – OPRAH! Housewives across America are rejoicing. Also impressive, Oprah’s cleavage. She is the best person to open the 60th (!) Primetime Emmy Awards.

8:00 – Television catchphrases. How cute. Peter Boyle tribute is the best.

7:46 – Observation: All the women nominated for Lead Actress in a Drama (except Sally Field) plays cops. Come-on Hollywood! We need to get some better female representation out there.

7:25 – Jay Manuel of America’s Next Top Model is giving us a fashion lesson. Liz: “We know what rouching is Jay! We all watch Project Runway!”

7:05 – Ricky Gervais. Hands down best interview. His response for who would play him on Extras: “I’m thinking of Brad Pitt, Johnny Depp, George Clooney… no I’m thinking of Mickey Rooney”.

6:58 – Jennifer Love Hewitt. People are worried about the 90210 girls being too skinny but what we should be concerned about is J. Love. Ever since those unfortunate pictures of her appeared she went from being proud of her curves to being super skinny.

6:44 – Steve Carell. Liz: “I was a Nancy Walls fan before I was a Steve Carell fan.” You know, not a lot of people can say that which is exactly why I’m watching this with Liz.

6:41 – Kristen Chenoweth! I love that she was nominated for Quote from my Emmys watching partner in crime Liz, “She’s always working. She’s like the female Ryan Seacrest.” Me: “Except better.”

6:35 – The Emmys pre-show with non-other than that putz of the entertainment journalist Ryan Seacrest has commenced (or at least this is when I started watching). In his interview with John Krasinski of The Office, Seacrest called it “The Officina”. He’s a funny guy that Seacrest.