Something happened to me last May. I became obsessed with Jeremy Renner and it took over my life. More times then I should probably admit, I turned into a crazed fangirl. I wasted hours of my life scouring the abyss of the Internet for undiscovered information about Renner. For no logical reason. It was just as inexplicable and ridiculous as my Orlando Bloom obsession circa 2003. Except in 2003, I was 14 and could barely use the Internet.
Around December I accepted that I had a problem. So I started making notes of every strange thing I did as I trolled the Internet. Because the most sensible way to get over your fake relationship with a celebrity is to publicly shame yourself.
So here is what happened. This is exactly like what went down with Odysseus and those Sirens.